Beach Reach '06

GET EXCITED!!!! BEACH REACH 07!!

What I learned while deer hunting

Thursday, Thanksgiving, my family and I rushed through our Thanksgiving Lunch, as normal. We then headed back to the house before heading out to the deer lease. This is the traditional Thanksgiving for my family, rushing through a meal so they can get on the road. The only difference this year is that I joined them on this journey to the deer lease, where in years past, I stay home.

The deer lease was four hours away, in West Texas somewhere. We were there for four days...shoot me now.

My family thought I couldn't deal with the whole no shower, potty in the woods, sleeping in a nasty camp. That didn't bother me. What did was that THERE WAS NOTHING TO DO.. I was bored out of my mind.

But with all this extra time I had while sitting and staring at the campsite, I came to many realizations.

1. I REALLY am ADD. I can't sit still. I can't be quiet for three hours. I can't sit for hours with nothing to do.

2. I am not as big of a fan of my family as everyone else is with theirs..if that makes sense. It seems that all of my friends absolutely LOVE their family. Don't get me wrong, my family is great and all. But stick me with them for four days non-stop, and I am pretty annoyed. It got to the point that EVERYTHING they did got on my nerves.

3. Another realization, which definitly wasn't and amazing feeling, was that I don't have much in common with my family. I want to talk about things that they don't care to listen to. That's a bummer...

4. When you the only place you can pee is in the woods, it makes you second guess yourself everytime you get an urge to go potty.

5. Five shots of tequila are a little much before going out with a gun. No this isn't from personal experience. My dad's best friend had a bit to drink before going out for the afternoon hunt.

Though there were many other realizations from the week. I think it will just be awhile before I head out to the deer lease again....

to and from nac..in 24 hours?

I don't know why, but for one reason or another, I came home Saturday night, only to return to Nac for ONE MEASY CLASS today. Once the class was done, I packed up and headed back home.

Driving 3 hours both ways...in less that 24 hours? On any other occasion, this would have been the worst mistake of my life, but it worked out. My best friend, Liz, came along for the ride.

I don't know if the drive has ever seemed any shorter or meaningful. We talked to whole time, to and from.

But it was the conversation that we had tonight that really got my brain-a-going. We were talking about random relationships...people we knew that we dating...people we knew that were married...you get my drift. We started talking about how we "could never see ourselves in a relationship right now..." Then, I asked "Is that true...or are we bitter?" After talking, we decided against the whole bitter thing (but this comes up later) and admitted to each other, and more importantly, to ourselves, that yes, we get lonely sometimes. This was us "boasting in our weaknesses," as Paul urges us to do. After a brief awkward silence, I said, "But maybe that's it...God wants us to go to Him when we are lonely, not seek for someone else..." Why had this thought JUST NOW come to my mind?

Bitterness was another topic of the night. We discussed past situations that, to our surprise, we are still a little bitter about. I admit, talking about this things was like opening an old wound that had not quite healed. After talking about it and REALLY listening to myself, I realized that I had hurt and bitterness built up from FOUR YEARS AGO towards some people. And that has hindered me, in ways I can't even imagine. But I have decided that I am tired of holding onto something I didnt even know I was still clutching. I am going to write a letter to these people.

Well this only led me to think...well who else do I need to make amends with? Who doesn't even know we are at odds?

I am glad that I am home for the next few days. I am even more stoked about going to the deer lease Thursday thru Saturday. I plan on using this time as a mini-retreat... Time for me to think...pray..listen to what God has to say...

and maybe write a few letters...

Job 11

I am pretty much camped out in Job 11 right now. So much of what is on my heart is expressed in this chapter.

verses 5 and 6 say...
Oh, how I wish that God would speak, that he would open his lips against you and disclose to you the secrets of wisdom, or true wisdom has two sides.

This whole praying continually thing... I won't lie.. I suck at it. I battle pretty much everyday. Sure, I am used to talking with God on a daily basis...but going to Him about the SAME DANG THING EVERYDAY FOR WELL OVER A MONTH NOW?!?!? come on! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I am getting frustrated. No need to beat around the bush, right? I am wondering WHERE THE HECK GOD IS IN ALL OF THIS... but it's good to know that someone else dealt with this too..

verses 7 thru 9 say...
"Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty?
They are higher than the heavens—what can you do? They are deeper than the depths of the grave —what can you know? Their measure is longer than the earth and wider than the sea.


I absolutely LOVE that God is a mystery...I love that I can't figure Him out. Knowing that I won't ever figure God out completely, or heck, even somewhat, makes me fall in love with Him even more. I love to sit and think... question things...And no, it doesn't mean I am less of a believer because of this questioning. Because it is a result of all of this pondering that I am going to God about so many things...learning more about Him...and in turn, falling more and more in love with Him. And THAT'S what I want my life to be about...knowing that God is a mystery, but somehow, I continue to know Him more and more...

Church bashing....err..

Why is church bashing so easy to do?

James 4:12 says "But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?"

A few of us met yesterday for a conversation about the "generative community of people struggleing together in their faith journey could look like here in Nacogdoches."

I thought it went relatively well...for a bit

But somewhere along the way, it turned into church bashing...which wasn't the goal set in our minds.

Landon said it so well when he said something to the effect of "not just 'righting the wrongs' because that would be making the assumption that we are right, and everyone else is wrong." I really thought this was a brilliant statement

Because they aren't wrong. My parents attend a traditional southern Baptist church...hymns, organs, definitly no drums, the occasional fire and brimstone sermon, deacons have way too much power, suits and ties for men, dresses for the girls, etc. But my parents aren't wrong, and neither are the other people of that church. It took me a long time to come to this realization, but I am glad that I have. Because yes, people DO worship like this. I may not be able to, but there are plenty of people that do. God is active in their lives just as much as He is in mine. It's not like I am doing it the ONLY RIGHT way...

Basically, everyone has been burnt by a church at some point. But the church is made of people...humans... who screw up. It's what we do.

Life is better..

I did something a couple of nights ago that I have never done before...I told someone else how I feel, in all honesty. I was terrified. I was nauseous. I said a few choice words in preparation. But when it was all over and done with, I felt alot better.

The next day, I finished lcasses and headed to the park. I was supposed to meet a friend, but she ended up not being able to make it. I decided to stay and just swing. Before long, I was swinging as high as I could, looking up to the sky with a little grin on my face. There were a three bagpipe players walking around the park, continually playing Amazing Grace.

I left the park that day thinking, "This is what life is about."

God didn't intend for me to carry around burdens for weeks on end. Life is better with honesty.

God is about enjoying the sun and the clouds and the trees. Life is better when you sit and take in the nature around you.

God is about swinging as high as you can, then laying back at those high points and relaxing. Life is better when you take time to swing, and swing high.

God is glorified when we continue to reflect on His grace. Life is better when you can enjoy bagpipe players playing Amazing Grace.




This week has had its ups and downs, like any other week. But I thank God that I was able to take some time to just be with Him, reflect on what life should be like, and praise Him for all of it.

Welcome to the Springs!

This past weekend I was fortunate enough to be a part of something new and exciting...

Joel, my former youth pastor and the man I have interned under, has felt God's call to start a new church in the Murphy/Plano area. I have been lucky enough to see it from the very super early stages. Seeing his core group meet and plan things all throughout the summer was encouraging. As block parties took place and flyers were being handed out door to door in the neighborhood, excitement built.

Meeting weekly in a home was where it all started. I admire this. I like the idea of small house churches.

This Sunday was their first "Preview Service." It met, like most church plants, in a local school. We all went up there Saturday night to set up. What I thought was going to be an "informational meeting" was actually manual labor. Chairs, screens, sound equipment, tents for the childrens area...all of it had to be set up.

As Sunday morning came, anticipation was all over. Greeters were strategically placed. The aroma of Starbucks coffee filled the air. Heck, I even got to wear a cool bright orange vest (it went with the theme...promise) for heading up the childrens worship. As families began to file in, contacts were made, smiles were given, excitement was everywhere...

And I loved every second of it... Just the idea of being part of something new...something exciting. I feel like I have learned alot just being an onlooker of Joel's amazing progress with The Springs. And I think I realized that I want to do this at some point. I want to be a part of a church plant. When? I don't know...maybe sooner rather than later???

some things never change

So I am at home, Garland, for the weekend...

And I must say, it gets weirder and weirder everytime I come home, and I am not sure why...

There's a really lame country song that says something about "you're always seventeen in your hometown..."

Could this be anymore true?

Liz and I talked about this for a long time last night. As for me and all of my friends in good ol G-town, we have all grown up, grown apart...and not that thats a bad thing, its just natural. But where it gets weird is when we all come home for a weekend and hang out. No matter how much we have changed, how our lives are different..we always revert back to the person we were a couple of years ago, during our "glory days." Those were the days when we, as a group of friends, were together at all times. We were corny, stupid, and immature.

It seems like it takes me alot longer to transition back to that. The rest of my friends can snap back so quickly, it almost creeps me out. Why can't I do that? I look back to where I was a few years ago and see someone completely different than who I am now. But because these people were such an important part of my life during that awkward time and not so much now, I feel I must revert back to that... and its really weird.

Is this what life is going to be like for the rest of my life? Getting together with a group of friends after a few years and transforming myself into who I once was. I don't know if I like that....and even worse, I don't know how to change that...