What does the future hold?

I knew the day would come when I realized that taking 20 hours along with doing an overload of everything else would be too much.

It's just too bad that that "day" has turned into several.

I had a slight breakdown today while in one of my horrendous early childhood classes (and no, these AREN'T easy classes...). I had forgotten one of the THREE assignments that were due today. That's when I opened up my planner, looked at everything I had going on, and was forced to remind myself to breathe.

And I think it really hit me...I don't want to do this. I don't want to teach for the rest of my life. Is that so wrong? Now I know that those words are "of the devil," if said in the education building. And I think that even for a while, I couldn't even believe that something that I had dreamed of being my entire life, a teacher, was no longer what my heart wanted.

I first felt God's tugging on my heart a few years ago. He really pressed ministry upon my heart. But I pushed it deep down and hoped that the few people I had told, that they would forget about it.

Until last spring. God shook me around and said HELLO! And I heard Him loud and clear. But I could not imagine giving up my childhood dream of becoming a teacher.

But God knew that I wouldn't be able to give up my dream on my own...so He changed my heart. Though I still love kids, I don't really have a heart for teaching them anymore. I know that God has called me to something different..something in the church...something with young people, and I am so stoked to continue to seek out what He has planned.

So what now? It looks like I will keep persuing a degree in education...there's pretty much no turning back now. And besides...I'll need that lovely piece of paper with "Bachelors of Science" on it in order to go to seminary...