so....its been a while

I have been up to a lot in the past couple of months... rather..God has been up to a lot. But Iw ant to share one story in particular.

Last Monday was the WMU World Day of Prayer. Our local association, the Hunt Baptist Association was hosting this event in Lone Oak, a small town about an hour outside of Commerce. I had been asked to lead out in the time of prayer for North America, so I knew I had to be on time. I was not completely sure where I was going. I had gotten turned around a couple of times, so I was definitly running a little behind.

I finally made it Lone Oak, but still not totally sure where the retreat center was. However, as I was pulling into the town, I saw this lady that was at least fifty years old walking down the two-lane highway. As I was beginning to pass her, I thought "I should pick her up." But knowing I was running late, I went ahead and passed her. I didnt get far before I felt bad and turned around, but then I remembered I was running late and turned back to find the retreat center. I got about a mile down the highway and I just KNEW I had to pick her up.

After stopping to pick up my new friend, Ms. Mary, she explained that her gas had been stolen from her truck for the THIRD DAY. I took her to the police station. Sometime during our conversation, I told her that I was in Lone Oak for a World Day of Prayer and invited her to join me. She was SO EXCITED TO!

We showed up a little late, but the ladies at the retreat center didn't mind at all. The World Day of Prayer went great, and I can say with confidence that I wasn't the only one who enjoyed Ms. Mary's presence.

As I was taking Ms. Mary back home, she went on and on praising the Lord for how things had worked out for her. She said that she was about to get laid off for the Rubbermaid factory, she was in a financial bind, and she was in the "eye of the storm," but she was going to keep praising the Lord.

I want faith like Ms. Mary's.

Happy 150th Post!!!

So I have decided that one of my favorite parts of doing collegiate ministry is that I can live vicariously through other students. For instance, while at SFA, I always wished I could have taken more art classes. Not only did I not have the space in my schedule, but I probably don't have the patience to work on ONE art piece for weeks at a time. However, it turns out that A&M Commerce has a pretty big art program. I have been able to help a couple of students with their art pieces, at my convenience. The best part is, when I want to quit and go home, I can!

Another example, I have always wanted to take a photography class. Just so happens we have a few photo majors at the BSM. I had one student take me up to the photo room and show me all the fun machines and gadgets that process the film. I am hoping to go with her next time she has to process film, and see the whole thing in action.

As a leadership team, we are working our way through UnChristian. I started reading this book earlier this summer, but it brings a whole new perspective on it when you discuss it with other people. I almost feel like the UnChristian book was written about me. I have a lot of the same ideas that are expressed in the book. I totally understand why non-believers aren't big fans of the church. Heck! There are plenty of times that I'm not a big fan of the church. ("church" as in body of believers, not building with a steeple).
This book deals with a lot of the conceptions not-yet-believers have of Christians today. Our leadership team so far has discussed the issues of hypocrisy and being too concerned with numbers. I was shocked with how many people (not just our leadership team) were taken aback by what the research showed.
Needless to say, next week, we are taking about the people thinking that Christians are anti-homosexual. Should be an interesting conversation..and yours truly is leading it....

LOVE it!

Ministry is hard

I have been in Commerce for 5 weeks now. Classes have been in session for two weeks. Some days I feel like I have been here for only a couple days. Other days, I feel like I have been here forever.

I have found the toughest thing about doing ministry, at least collegiate ministry, is you can't force someone to have a heart for the campus. I want so badly to get into the students' minds and make them understand that there is a whole campus out there that does not know the Lord. I want them to have compassion for these people.

I can tell them over and over again about Jesus' heart for all, but until it "clicks" with them, I can only sit back, encourage them, and above all, pray for the campus...which is exactly what I intend to do.

I MADE IT!

I made it thru my first "real" week as an intern. There were times that I thought the week would never end. It seemed like we had event after event after event.

I am still working on getting to know everybody. At times, I found myself getting jealous of people who are interning at the campus they graduated from. They already know everybody. There were many times this week when someone would wonder into the BSM or up to me at an event. I would introduce myself and start telling them a bit about whats going on at the BSM, and they would look back at me like I was an idiot and say, "I know. I come here all the time." SHOOT!

I was feeling a little discouraged by the end of the week. I was really struggling with my purpose here...but I met someone at Overflow on Thursday night that really lifted my spirits. Afterwards, we were cleaning everything up and there was still some students just hanging out. Koji was standing off by himself, so I went up and introduced myself to him. He told me that he had graduated from A&M Commerce last May and was simply back for a visit. We began talking about him being an international student from Japan. His story is amazing....

Koji first came to Texas from Japan four years ago. He was at Trinity Valley Community College in Athens....a happening place. There, he had a few friends that would occassionally invite him to the free lunch at the BSM. He went, only to leave frustrated with all the "Christian stuff." One day, he was in the library, when another student from the BSM just walked by and said hello to him. He claims to have not known the girl, but felt like there was simply something different about her. Later that week, he wondered into the BSM for another lunch. A few weeks later, the BSM director told him about a group of Asian students from DBU that were getting together for a fellowship. He decided to join them, in hopes of asking some hard questions. And he did just that. After leaving that night, he wrestled for a while about what God had planted in his heart. He later went to meet with the director of the BSM at TVCC, where he prayed to invite Christ in his life.


And now....just THREE YEARS LATER.... he is in seminary. I was dumbfounded. Here was this guy, who was SO PUMPED UP about his Savior. He has been on many short-term mission trips, and is now studying to be a church planter or missionary. I want to be like Koji.

Its been a crazy week... more to come later.

But until then...check this out. I saw it on BBC News and thought it was worth sharing.

Joel owes me some money

It all started on August 6th, when Joel uploaded a certain video to his blog. (So before you watch my video, I BEG for you to watch the video on his. Otherwise, I fear what you will think about my video as a stand-alone)

So I watched the video on his blog, and my first thought was " OH MY GOSH!! That girl is a ME when I was little...we are ONE IN THE SAME!" I was not the only one to have that reaction once watching the video. I have talked to others who also think that this little girl is me reincarnated.

I couldn't let this 10 year old show me up. So here you go....

I just got back from a Campus Missionary/Intern retreat. I was a little nervous going into it. But I really did have a great time. I met some awesome people that are serving on campuses all over Texas. It was so (not to sound corny) inspiring to hear their hearts for college students. It also helped with the whole "lonely" factor. Meeting people who are kinda in the same boat as me was refreshing. It's good to know I am not alone.

We also got so many different resources. I am so stoked for this semester now.

Cribs: Commerce Style

Well, kids... I have survived my first week in Commerce. Can't say it was the most exciting weeks of my life. I still only know maybe...two people. Therefore, my weekend was pretty bland. I watched a total of five rented movies... and I'm pretty much okay with that.

Man..but visiting a church all by yourself is a new kind of lonesome. I visited one this morning... and I'm pretty sure they could have cared less that I was there. Not one person talked to me...even in Sunday school! But, I am going to try to give them the benefit of the doubt and say they were having an "off" day...so I will give it another try. I did visit another church tonight that I enjoyed. It is a brand new church plant here in Commerce. A lot of young people, but some families as well. They seem to be a tight knit community...which I'm down for.

Brittany came to visit me last Thursday...which was SO EXCITING!!! I dont know if I have ever been so excited to see her. I was getting a little lonesome, so she was JUST what I needed. We even filmed our own version of "Cribs." I am hoping to post it tomorrow, once I get internet at the apt.

Well... I think I hear another movie calling my name...

..until next time..

Howdy...from Commerce!

Well.... its day two on the job. I moved down here on Sunday. I love my apartment...though its weird to live by myself. I keep waiting for Lindsay to walk in the door so we can make plans about the next Gilmore Girls we will watch. Maybe once I get the boxes cleared away, I will post some pics.
I got the pleasure of going to an associational meeting last night. Not too bad.
I am looking forward to meeting more students. I have spent the last day and a half working on my office...you know...putting stuff on the walls, filling the bookshelves...that kind of stuff. Classes dont start til the 25th. I hope I get more to do before then.

I wish I was a black woman...

If you know me at all, you would know that I am slightly in love with Tyler Perry. Madea is my hero. I recently read Tyler Perry's book "Don't Make a Black Woman Take Off Her Earrings." I loved it. All of it. Because put bluntly, I love black people. I love their culture, their humor, all of it.

As I was reading, "Madea" (Tyler Perry) makes an AMAZING point about friendships. Seeing as how this is an issue I have been worried about/struggling with... I thought I'd share:

"Some people come into your life for a lifetime and some come for a season. You have to know which is which. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are leaves on a tree. The wind blows, they go to the left. They are just unstable. You can't count on them for nothing. All they ever do is take from that tree. What you need to understand about a leaf is that it has a season. It'll wither and die and blow away. There ain't no need to be praying over a leaf to be resurrected. When it's dead it's gone. Let it go. Some people are like that. All the leaf ever does is cool you off every now and then. If you're grown, you know what I'm talking about, because you can call them in the middle of the night and get cooled off. That's the leaf people. They come and take.

"Then there are people like a branch. You got to be careful with branch people. They come in all different shapes and sizes. You never know how strong they will be in your life. So my advice is to tip out on it slowly. When you're going out on a limb, don't put too much weight on it at once, because it can fall and leave you high and dry. Sometimes, you have to wait for a branch to grow up before it can hold all of the thigns you want to share with it.

"Finally, there are people who are like the roots at the bottom of the tree. If you find yourself two or three people in your entire lifetime that are like the roots, then you are blessed. The roots don't care nothing about being seen. All they're there to do is hold that tree up, to make sure it stays in the air. It comes from the earth to give that tree everything it needs. That's what relationships should be about. That's what you need, people who want to be in your life for the right reasons.

"If somebody wants to walk out of your life, you've got to LET THEM GO. When you learn to love yourself, you will end up giving standards to everbody around you. Again, I repeat for emphasis, if they don't meet those standards, you have to let them go, because they might be a leaf. And forgive them with all your might."


....ahh.... I love Madea

So I am officially obsessed with blogs. Google Reader is the most handy thing ever invented. With it, I subscribe to numerous blogs, but can read them all in one place.

One that I love to look at is boston.com/bigpicture. Check it out. This is my fave so far....




And I thought police on segways were kinda silly....

i love sports

i know its another video....but just watch it

steve harvey introduces jesus

the elephant in the room...

Graduation was merely two months ago. On the dot. And already, I have lost contact with 99% of my friends from SFA.

This has probably been because of a lack of effort on both sides. I gotta say though, there are somedays where I'm fine with how things have turned out. There are other days where it flat out STINKS.

It's days like I have had lately that can be rough when it comes to this whole "recently friend-less" season of my life. I've really been struggling during the past week, in a couple of ways. Simply put, I've been down. There have been a couple of things that I thought were pretty much dealt with that keep creeping back up. Can't say I'm a fan.

It's in those moments where I wish I could pick up the phone and call someone who was familar with the situation. The only thing worse that dealing with a problem is to have to explain how the problem started to someone before whining about the actual thing.

Of course I knew a time like this would come. I heard someone make a really good point once....Growing up, we always had "school friends." These were the people in grade school up to high school that were your friends at school, but not so much outside of school. Well when we go off to college, we may think that our days of having "school friends" are over. But maybe they aren't. Maybe instead of "school friends" clocking out at the end of each school day, they clock out at graduation. After all, when you are away at school, the "school friends" are all you have. You often don't have "real friends" to come home to at the end of the day.

It's just a thought.

And I dont say this to put down the amazing people I was close with over the past four years. I would not trade anything for everything each of them has done for me. And as much as my prideful self hates to admit it, there are times that I miss these people... a lot.

I am going to Commerce.

That being said...why does everyone constantly ask me "why?" Many people have asked why would I EVER want to go to Commerce when I had Minneapolis at my fingertips. Countless people ask WHY WOULD I EVEN THINK ABOUT starting a young adult ministry/small group at my home church when I am only here for the summer?

Get off my back.

Don't you think I have prayed and sought God out on this? Because I have. And I am confident on what He has be doing right now.

I would have LOVED to have gone to Minneapolis. It kills me that I am still turning down job offers up there. But a lot has come to head over the past month or so. I realized that in going to Minneapolis, I would be looking for an easy escape, simply running away. And I can't do that. Because I am tired of running.

a little update..


turned down the job in Minneapolis.

Went to Commerce on Friday to talk about a job there.

Freaked out.

Got another job offer in Minneapolis.

I'm not ready to make a big-girl decision.

Moving home has proven to be a lot harder than I thought. And I even knew coming into it that it wouldn't be easy.

To say the least, relationships have changed... all of them. A lot of them have fizzled out. It's only been a month since my days in Nac came to an end, and already, I think my phone bill wont be nearly as high.

Went to Nac this weekend... by far the worst mistake of my life. My heart was shattered, in more ways than one.

Turned down a job to Minneapolis... Never thought I'd say that.

My life is in a serious rut. I feel like everything has gone to pot...and has been for awhile. I have just been masking it all...I realized that going to Minneapolis would be running away from my problems, my aching heart. It sucks, no doubt..but it is what it is.