It is a beautiful day. I could not ask for a more gloriously gorgeous afternoon to spend out here on the hammock.

So here I am, spending my Sunday afternoon chilling in the hammock.

I was writing a letter, one that I have been putting for a while, one that is incredibly hard to write out. However, I am praying it will bring healing. I feel that in the last year or so, that is all I have been yearning for...healing.

I had just started writing the most difficult part of this particular letter. In doing so, I am making myself so incredibly vulnerable. Just seeing it all on paper makes the pain increase. I feel as if I am ripping open a terrible wound, but one that is simply trying to heal under my self-imposed band-aid. I have attempted to put band-aid after band-aid on a gaping wound. I pray that in ripping off what I hope is the last band-aid, I can begin an actual healing process.

Needless to say, I am beginning to put delicate words on paper, feeling extremely vulnerable and possibly lonely. With iTunes on shuffle, the classic song "You Are So Beautiful to Me" starts playing. I couldn't help but put a pause on my letter and look around at the beautiful day. And in that moment, I felt as if God was singing this out to me. He is comforting me, reassuring me of His love and passion for me.

I found great comfort in Him at that moment. Though I am ripping at a deep and painful wound, He is there, helping to bring me healing and peace.

Been thinking about relationships recently, and the necessity and roles of them.

I screwed up this weekend. Won't go into details...but in doing so, I thought about my relationships. Shouldn't quality relationships provide a net for when you screw up?

I found myself worrying about what people were going to think about me when they find out that I screwed up...Won't they be disappointed, mad, or any other negative response?

Should I worry about this? No...

The people you love are supposed to love you...in your bad times too.

So next time I screw up, and I am sure that I will, I don't plan on worrying about what everyones gonna think....I'll just look for someone to help me back up.